Dr. Boyce: Oprah and Iyanla Finally Settle the Beef

by Dr. Boyce Watkins, Syracuse University – Scholarship in Action 

I watched with extreme curiosity as the great Iyanla Vanzant emerged again on the Oprah Winfrey show after being gone for a full 11 years. I wasn't entirely connected to the feud between Winfrey and Vanzant, primarily because we don't think much about people that we haven't seen in over a decade. Of course Oprah is on everyone's mind, and even those who don't follow her seem to know everything she has been up to.

As the guest came to the stage, even a man from Mars could tell that there was latent mega-beef between Oprah and Iyanla. Both women seemed to overcompensate when it came to doing all they could to prove that the past was the past and that everything was OK. But the tension was so thick that it seemed to suck the oxygen out of the room.

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Should Black People Reject Valentine’s Day?

by Dr. Boyce Watkins, Syracuse University – Scholarship in Action 

Most men know how expensive Valentine's Day can get. Someone decided that spending money is somehow a translation to showing love, which is an interesting misguided relationship philosophy. Valentine's Day is one of the most over-hyped holidays known to man, with advertising starting right after Christmas. Any man in a serious relationship is well-aware of the pending doom of his social life if he doesn't flex his wallet at least a little bit on that special day.
According to the National Federation's 2010 Valentine's Day Consumer Intentions and Actions Survey, over $14 billion is spent on Valentine's Day related purchases. This is roughly $103 for every single man, woman and child in America. Yes, the hype has real economic consequences.

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S. Tia Brown: Supporting Your Man as an Entrepreneur

by S. Tia Brown, Essence.com

First let me say this: I am single. However, just like you don't have to smoke crack to tell "rockheads" don't do it... well, you get the rest.
Second, I'm an avid, calendar-clearing, repeat-watching fan of the "Real Housewives of Atlanta." You know the type. I text my girls during the commercials. I feel like I know the "ins and outs" of the cast intimately. And, occasionally I pass judgment on their decisions.
With those two details out the way, it's time for my third assertion: When it comes to marriage, particularly to an entrepreneur, it can't always be tit for tat. Over the last few weeks I've watched Cynthia Bailey's now husband, Peter Thomas, try to pull out the dagger ripping his heart apart as his business -- their family's bread and butter-- revenue dropped lower than NeNe Leakes' cleavage line. Thomas shared his woes about picking up the pieces. Bailey worried about financing their wedding. Thomas grew angrier about not getting investors. Bailey balled about being owed her investment in his business. Thomas was forced to close his restaurant and rebuild. Bailey cried about not going on a honeymoon. All I kept thinking is, "where dey do dat at?"

 

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Sil lai Abrams: How to Deal with Financial Insecurity

by Sil lai Abrams – Sepiaprocess.com

When times are difficult for us financially, we can become paralyzed by fear. As the fear grows in our mind we often get stuck focusing on the problem and not actively searching for a solution. Our attention becomes fixated on our creditors and as we look at our mountain of debt we can become weighed down in despair and shame. “I’m never going to get through this” or “This is more than I can handle” begins to play on a constant loop in our brain. Some of us respond to our problem with denial. Instead of facing our lack of money, we spend as if we have unlimited resources, compounding our original financial instability. Or, we may isolate from others and numb ourselves with food, alcohol or television. Sometimes we avoid dealing with our situation by throwing ourselves into a relationship that takes up all of our time. None of these counterproductive behaviors do anything to bring us closer to a solution. They only keep us stuck in our problem by postponing or delaying our eventual day of financial reckoning.

 

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